A good rainy Wednesday afternoon….I woke up waaaay too late (way too late for me is about 9:30 or 10:00). At first I was up at 7:30, made pancakes, and got back into bed. Not a good idea! I slept for another two hours!!
I jumped out of bed feeling super inspired, and got myself ready for an afternoon at my desk. I thought in the shower “NO DISTRACTIONS TODAY BRYANNA!”. Leave the dishes, leave the groceries, leave everything til you are done at your art desk. So I took a seat and began to work.
It was not an easy afternoon…it’s harder and harder the more time you spend away from your work. You sort of lose your flow, your imagination becomes more and more distant until it’s completely out of your grasp! It’s terrible! It takes three times the effort (or more) to get back to where you started from, or to get back and keep moving forward when you stop working. Not good!
Today I sort of came to the realization that I’ve lost my sense of fun and imagination in my artwork. I have sort of a revelation…”if you’re not having fun, then why are you doing this?”
At first I struggled through some buildings, I thought it would be fun or interesting to make a city full of hairy buildings….but it didn’t really look or feel right to me. I researched hair….tried to figure out how I could make it better, and then I started to draw hairy boxes in perspective….and then it hit me that this is pretty silly, and not very exciting.
Maybe a good experiment with pen and ink…but I think I’m over it. I was feeling kind of lost. Sometimes I write myself notes of encouragement in times like these….
I decided to quit thinking so much. I used to be able to just DRAW crazy creatures and people and animals from my imagination. I didn’t think, I’d just put the pencil to the paper and get to work. So I tried it. I dipped my paint brush in ink, and when I noticed myself falling into my old habits I stopped myself, and started a new line, or transformed what I had in mind into something new, until these creatures appeared on my page:
And I thought to myself….this is probably the truest thing to myself that I have drawn in a long time. I feel like it came straight out of somewhere inside of me, and unfurled itself onto the page. Its a strange image of course, and I think I could do without the weird lady in the middle of the page, but I was excited to see that there was still something hanging out deep inside of my brain that I was able to tap into. So I draw some more…
And I thought…”I like these dogs!”. They have good character, and I have no idea where they came from….maybe them stemmed from all of the fur I had been drawing earlier…not sure, but I think they will stick around for a while as a reminder to me to be ME, and to stop thinking so much. Overall a good day in the studio 🙂
Hope your Wednesday is going!